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Understanding Conflict
By Dr. Jackie Black
Conflict is inevitable and a normal part of life. Healthy can lead to positive changes in personal relationships. Negative can be very destructive and can sap energy from everyone around.

Causes of Conflict

Searching for the causes can be helpful in resolving the conflict. Here are some common causes to be aware of:

  • Misunderstandings
  • Personality clashes
  • Differences in values or goals
  • Unclear responsibilities
  • Needs or wants are not being met
  • Values are being challenged
  • Boundaries are being violated
  • Perceptions are being questioned
  • Assumptions are being made
  • Perceived lack of resources
  • Dissatisfaction or disappointment
  • Change of any kind
  • Awareness or knowledge is minimal


  • Our articles continue...
  • Federal Court in New Jersey Rules That FAA Preempts Rule Against Class Waivers in Arbitration Agreements

    Eighth Circuit Upholds Class Waiver Where Arbitration Agreement and Statutory Fee-Shifting Provision Would Allow Claimant to Recover Her Attorney Fees

    California Law Allows Parties to Contract for Heightened Judicial Review of Arbitration Awards

    Court Upholds Class Waiver in Wireless Service Agreement Because Customer Had "Meaningful Opportunity" to Reject the Agreement

    Texas Court of Appeals: Parties Cannot Obtain Heightened Judicial Review by Arguing That Arbitrator Exceeded Their Powers

    Arbitrator Did Not Exceed Powers by Applying Equitable Principles and Excusing Noncompliance with Notice-and-Cure Provision

    Arbitration Rules Provided Legal Basis for Attorney Fees Award By Authorizing Arbitrator to Grant Any "Just and Equitable" Relief

    Party Who Received Notice of Arbitration But Did Not Object Can Not Raise Post-Award Challenge to Existence of Arbitration Agreement

    Colorado Law Permits Attorney-in-Fact to Agree to Arbitration on Behalf of Nursing Home Resident

    Sexual Assault Claim Falls Outside the Scope of Employee's Arbitration Agreement

    Louisiana Court Holds That FAA Deadline for Challenging Award Does Not Preclude Party from Arguing No Arbitration Agreement

    FAA Preempts Texas Law Imposing Special Conditions on Agreements to Arbitrate Personal Injury Claims

    FAA Does Not Apply to Mediation Agreements

    FORUM Code of Procedure Authorizes Arbitrators to Sanction Parties Who Bring Frivolous Claims

    Federal Court Honors Choice-of-Law Provision and Upholds Class Waiver Under Virginia Law

    Third Circuit Finds No Procedural Unconscionability Where Employee Agreeing to Arbitrate Was Highly Educated

    California Court Finds That Parties Cannot Contract for Heightened Judicial Review of Arbitration Awards

    Sixth Circuit Holds That Non-Signatories Have No Right to Interlocutory Appeal of Order Denying Arbitration

    Arkansas Federal Court Finds That FAA Preempts Mutuality Requirement

    Under Missouri Law, Wrongful Death Claims Now Arbitrable Under Decedent's Arbitration Agreement

    Reference to Arbitration Rules Proves Parties' Intent to Submit Arbitrability Questions to Arbitrator

    Arbitrator Exceeded His Powers by Disregarding Parties' Instructions to Apply Wisconsin Law

    Supreme Court Holds That FAA Grounds for Vacatur Are Exclusive

    Federal Arbitration Act Preempts Oklahoma Law Disallowing Arbitration Agreements in Nursing Home Contracts

    Seventh Circuit Upholds Arbitrator's Award of Equitable Relief

    Supreme Court Grants Cert to Answer Lingering Question on Permissible Scope of Union-Negotiated Arbitration Agreements

    Termination of Employee for Refusing to Execute an Arbitration Agreement Covering Pending Claims Held "Retaliatory" by Eleventh Circuit

    Supreme Court Holds That "Judge Alex" Must Arbitrate Dispute with Alleged Talent Agent

    North Carolina Supreme Court Finds Arbitration Cost-Prohibitive Where Agreement Required Losing Party to Pay for Arbitral Appeal

    Arbitration Agreements "Part of the Bargain" If Conspicuous or Brought to Attention Elsewhere in the Contract

    Under Mississippi Law, Health Care Surrogates Have Statutory Authority to Agree to Arbitration

    Law Firm Did Not Waive Right to Arbitrate by Filing Collection Lawsuit

    Ninth Circuit Finds Class Waiver Unenforceable Under Washington Law

    Pennsylvania Supreme Court Finds No Federal Preemption of State's Thirty Day Limit on Challenging Arbitration Awards

    Party Waived Challenge to Validity of Arbitration Agreement by Not Appearing in Court or Arbitration

    Agreement to Arbitrate Must Be Mandatory To Be "Health Care Decision" Under Mississippi Statute

    Arbitration Rules Preserve Arbitration Agreement by Allowing Claimant to Avoid Unaffordable Costs

    Arbitrators' Lack of Information Does Not Constitute "Mistake" That Would Warrant Award Modification

    Awareness of Underlying Contract Along with Access to Its Terms Sufficient to Prove Existence of Arbitration Agreement

    Notice Deficiencies Render Class Waiver Unenforceable Under Massachusetts Law

    Prohibition on Written Opinions Renders Employee's Arbitration Agreement Unenforceable

    Party Fails to Preserve Issue of Arbitrability by Not Objecting to Arbitration Proceeding

    Federal Court Grants Comity to Tribal Court's Vacatur of Arbitration Award

    Three-Month Deadline for Challenging Award Started to Run When Award Was Placed in the Mail

    Power of Attorney for Health Care Decisions Authorized Attorney-in-Fact to Enter Arbitration Agreement

    Upholding Class Waiver Under Texas Law Did Not Violate Public Policy of Washington

    Award Confirmation Does Not Require Signed Agreement

    Ninth Circuit Finds Class Waiver Unenforceable Under California Law

    Dispute Arising from "Deep Throat" Revelation Must Be Arbitrated

    Nonsignatory Fails in Attempt to Compel Arbitration of Dispute Arising from Separate Agreement

    Inventorship Disputes Can Be Resolved Through Arbitration

    Good Faith Appeal from Order Denying Arbitration Precludes Further Discovery

    Party Waived Right to Arbitrate By Misleading Court on Terms of Proposed Settlement

    New Mexico Court Honors Texas Choice-of-Law Provision in Upholding Arbitration Agreement

    Arbitrator Must Decide Whether Party Complied with Conditions Precedent to Arbitration

    Oregon Court Relies on AAA's Class Arbitration Policy in Holding That Arbitration Agreement Permits Class-Wide Proceedings

    Second Circuit Finds "Evident Partiality" Where Arbitrator Attempted to Preserve Neutrality by Not Investigating a Potential Conflict

    Proper Mailing of Arbitration Agreement Creates Presumption of Receipt

    Federal Court Honors Choice-of-Law Provision and Upholds Class Action Waiver Under Texas Law

    Arbitrator Exceeded His Powers by Disregarding Contractual Mandate to Award Attorney Fees to the Prevailing Party

    Doctrine of "Complete Preemption" Creates Federal Jurisdiction over Petition to Compel Arbitration

    Arbitrator, Not Court, Must Decide Whether Arbitration Proceedings Should Be Consolidated

    New Jersey Arbitration Act Expressly Permits Parties to Contract for Heightened Judicial Review

    Operator of Virtual World "Second Life" Must Resolve Real World Dispute in Court

    California Law Does Not Allow Parties to Challenge Arbitration Awards Beyond the Statutory Deadline

    Colorado Supreme Court Rejects "Intertwining Doctrine" As Basis for Denying Arbitration

    New Jersey Federal Court Applies Utah Law in Upholding Bar on Class-Wide Proceedings

    Disclosure of Early Neutral Evaluation Violated Court's ADR Rules

    Fifth Circuit Upholds Arbitration Agreement in Employment Dispute

    Alabama Supreme Court Finds "Clear and Unmistakable" Evidence of Intent to Arbitrate Questions of Arbitrability

    Arbitrators Exceeded Their Authority by Ignoring Clear Language of Contract

    Class Action Waiver Upheld Under D.C. Law

    Ninth Circuit Implicitly Adopts Rebuttable Presumption of Procedural Unconscionability, but Only for Employee Contracts

    Ohio Supreme Court Preserves Arbitration Agreement by Severing Provision for Heightened Review

    Presumption in Favor of Arbitration Does Not Extend to Jury Trial Waivers

    Court Can Delve into Merits of Arbitrable Dispute When Party Seeking Arbitration Requests Ruling on the Merits

    Eleventh Circuit: Federal Courts Have Jurisdiction Over a Petition to Compel Arbitration If Underlying Dispute Presents Federal Question

    Court Refuses to Enforce Arbitration Agreement Because AHLA Arbitration Rules Elevated the Claimant's Evidentiary Burden

    Claim of Duress Raised a Question for the Arbitrator, Not the Court, Because Alleged Duress Related to the Contract As a Whole

    Connecticut Supreme Court Upholds AAA Arbitration Award Despite Vacancy on Arbitration Panel

    Federal Court Follows Majority Rule and Stays Further Proceedings Pending Appeal from Order Denying Arbitration

    Lack of Mutuality Does Not Necessarily Invalidate an Arbitration Agreement Under Oregon Law

    Federal Court Upholds Class Action Waiver Under Arkansas Law

    Lack of Mutuality and Limitation on Damages Render Arbitration Agreement Unenforceable Under South Carolina Law

    California Court Honors Delaware Choice-of-Law Provision in Upholding Agreement to Arbitrate

    Fourth Circuit: Validity of Class Action Waiver Is a Procedural Question for the Arbitrator, Not a Gateway Issue for the Court

    Arbitration Agreement Governs Underlying Contract Rejected by Bankruptcy Debtor

    Kentucky Savings Statute Tolls Deadline for Challenging Arbitration Award

    Frivolous Challenge to Arbitration Award Triggers Sanctions

    Maryland Court "Stands Firm in the Majority" of Courts Upholding Class Action Waivers

    Court Rejects Unconscionability Challenge to Arbitrator's Determination That Class-Wide Proceedings Were Unavailable

    California Court Finds That Husband Did Not Have Statutory Authority to Enter Arbitration Agreement on Wife's Behalf

    Second Circuit Precedent Allows Courts to Grant Provisional Remedies When International Arbitration Is Pending

    Court Finds That Arbitration Can Advance Policy Embodied by Antihazing Statute

    Employee Cannot Intervene in EEOC Enforcement Lawsuit If Discrimination Claims Are Subject to Arbitration

    ADR Provision Remains in Force After Termination of Underlying Contract

    Florida Law Does Not Allow Interlocutory Appeal from Order Vacating Arbitration Award

    NASD Arbitration Rules Do Not Allow Class Action Waivers

    Florida Courts Remain Split on Who Decides Enforceability of Liability Limitations: Judge or Arbitrator?

    Broad Arbitration Clause Empowers Arbitrator to Decide All Disputes, Including Enforceability of Exculpatory Clause

    Arbitrator Decides Challenge to Underlying Contract Whenever FAA Governs Arbitration Clause

    Arbitrator Exceeded Powers by Awarding Treble Damages When Claimant Only Sought Actual Damages

    Core Bankruptcy Proceeding Disputes Are Arbitrable

    Arbitrator's Award Was Sufficiently Detailed to Satisfy the Parties' Agreement That the Arbitrator Must Issue a "Reasoned" Award

    California Federal Court Honors Choice-of-Law Provision and Upholds Class Action Waiver

    Non-Signatory to Arbitration Agreement Must Object to Jurisdiction Before Award Is Issued

    Arbitrators Exceeded Their Powers by Awarding Fees in Contravention of the Parties' Agreement

    Nonsignatories Under the Doctrine of Equitable Estoppel Enjoy FAA Right of Appeal

    Federal Court Treats "Infancy Doctrine" As a Question for the Court to Determine Existence of Arbitration Agreement

    Eighth Circuit Upholds Arbitration Award over Public Policy Challenge

    Arbitration Agreement Continues in Effect After Expiration of Underlying Contract

    Fifth Circuit Holds That Arbitration Clause in Settlement Agreement Between Seaman and Employer Is Covered by FAA

    Court Rejects Unconscionability Challenge to Nursing Home Arbitration

    Missouri Court: Motions to Compel Arbitration Will Not Be Granted Unless Served on Opposing Party Within a Reasonable Time

    Challenge to Arbitration Award Must Be Timely

    Court Orders Arbitration of Derivative Action Pursuant to Shareholders' Arbitration Agreement

    Federal Court in Colorado Upholds Bar on Class-Wide Proceedings

    Mississippi Supreme Court Upholds Agreement to Arbitrate Questions of Arbitrability

    Party Can Seek an Order Compelling Arbitration When Opposing Party Refuses to Arbitrate in Designated Locale

    Arbitrator Must Decide Whether a Party Has Waived Right to Arbitrate, Unless Alleged Waiver Is Based on Litigation Conduct

    Seventh Circuit: FAA Does Not Require Court to Stay Entire Case When Only Some Issues Are Subject to Arbitration

    Texas Federal Court Overturns Arbitral Award Based on Parties' Agreement for a Heightened Standard of Review

    Limited Right of Modification Makes Arbitration Agreement Fair and Enforceable

    Challenge to Validity of the Contract As a Whole Must Go to the Arbitrator

    Receipt of Medicaid Payments Triggers Application of Federal Arbitration Act to Employment Dispute

    Sixth Circuit Concludes Arbitrators Did Not Exceed Powers and Upholds Summary Arbitration Award

    Fifth Circuit Upholds Finality of Arbitration by Rejecting Nondisclosure of Trivial Relationships As a Basis for Vacatur

    Individual Members of Group Health Plan Are Entitled to Arbitration Disclosures Required by California Law

    California Courts Are Split on Whether Opt-Out Provision with Delayed Consequences Ensures Enforceability of Class Action Waiver

    California Law Governing Attorney-Client Fee Disputes Preempts Binding Arbitration Under State Law, but May Not Under FAA

    Under Texas Law, Unconscionability Challenge to Arbitration Agreement Requires Proof of Procedural and Substantive Unconscionability

    California Courts Lack Authority to Order Mediation in Some Cases

    Workers' Compensation Claim Falls Within Employee's Arbitration Agreement

    Oklahoma Supreme Court Diverges from Majority Rule in Holding That the FAA Did Not Apply to a Nursing Home's Arbitration Agreement

    Court Cannot Proceed to Trial While Question of Arbitrability Is Under Appeal

    Texas Supreme Court Allows Nonsignatories to Claim Benefits of Arbitration

    Arbitrator Can Exceed Powers by Committing an Error of Law

    Under California Law, Direct Expression of Binding Intent Is Necessary to Exempt Settlement Agreement from Mediation Confidentiality

    Mediated Settlement Terms Gave Party Enforceable Seven-Day Right of Revocation

    Fifth Circuit Reaffirms Pro-Arbitration Federal Policy and Upholds "Expansive" Arbitration Agreement

    Georgia Supreme Court Holds That Prior Arbitration Award Has Res Judicata Effect

    Arbitration Moves Forward Even Though Claimant Invoked Right Against Self-Incrimination

    Inclusion of Person's Name on Contract Did Not Alone Prove Assent to Arbitration Agreement

    Ninth Circuit Splinters on Proper Application of Buckeye

    Louisiana Court Rejects Manifest Disregard of the Law as a Basis for Challenging Arbitration Awards

    Court Enforces Arbitration Agreement Absent Specific Evidence That Arbitration Costs Are Excessive and Deter Individual Claims

    Frivolous Challenge to Arbitration Award Triggers Sanctions

    No Amore for Italian Film Distributor Who Waived the Protections of a California Statute Governing International Arbitration

    Despite Conflicting Procedures, Separate Arbitration Provisions Still Show Intent to Arbitrate

    Federal Court Upholds Credit Card Arbitration Agreement Formed by Change of Terms and Subsequent Use

    Courts Will Not Consider Allegations of Arbitrator Bias Until Award Is Issued

    Court Upholds Arbitration Award Finding Employer Liable for Discrimination

    Confidentiality Protections Apply to Hybrid Procedure Consisting of Arbitration and Mediation

    California Federal Court Stays Litigation While Ninth Circuit Decides Issue of Arbitral Class Waiver

    Lack of Evidence Is Fatal to Motion to Vacate an Arbitration Award

    Arbitrator Exceeds His Powers by Committing Legal Error

    California Court Errs by Holding Hearing After, Not Before, Motion to Compel Arbitration

    Nonsignatory Must Arbitrate if Receiving Direct Benefits From the Underlying Contract

    Indiana Court Refuses to Follow FTC's "Unreasonable" Position on Arbitration of Warranty Claims

    FAA Preempts Nebraska Law Requiring Conspicuous Notice of Arbitration Clause

    Court Upholds Arbitration Agreement Formed by "Clicking" Acceptance

    California Federal Court Upholds Arbitration Agreement Containing Class Action Waiver

    Broad Arbitration Clause Covering Future Timber Disputes Remains in Force Years After Harvest

    Individual Investor Recoups Losses at Arbitration

    Florida Supreme Court Affirms Arbitrator's Authority to Decide Timeliness Defenses

    Michigan Court Applies Rational Basis Test to Arbitrators' Award

    Arbitrators Have Full Authority to Grant Summary Judgment

    Thoroughbred Arbitration Award Has Racehorse Owner Out of Joint

    Arbitration Agreement Does Not Support Exercise of Personal Jurisdiction for a Lawsuit By a Nonsignatory

    Arbitration Agreements in Loan Documents Need to Exhibit Mutual Obligations to Arbitrate Claims

    Employee Prevails in Attempt to Submit Employment Dispute to Arbitration

    Court Strongly Endorses Use of Arbitration for Sarbanes-Oxley Employment Claims

    Tenth Circuit Holds That Continued Employment Constitutes Assent to Arbitration Agreement

    Illinois Supreme Court Supports Class Arbitration Waivers Where Consumers Can Opt Out or Have Affordable Arbitral Remedy

    Claims Related to Embezzlement at Law Firm Arbitrable Even With Questionable Litigation Carve Out

    California's Mediation Confidentiality Rule Does Not Bar Evidence of Oral Settlement Agreement Reached at Mediation

    Arbitration of Fee Dispute and Res Judicata Bar Subsequent Malpractice Lawsuit by E Street Ex

    Confidentiality Agreement Protects Statement Made at Mediation

    Arbitration Agreement Survives Buyer's Attempt to Undo the Sales Transaction and Covers Non-Signatory Collection Agency

    Arbitration Award Bars Subsequent RICO Action Under Doctrine of Res Judicata

    First Circuit: There Is No Manifest Disregard Unless the Arbitrator Expressly Disregards the Applicable Substantive Law

    Court May Modify Execution of Terms, but not Substance, of Foreign Arbitration Award

    Arbitrator Exceeded Authority by Awarding More Than Amount Requested

    Fifth Circuit Holds That Arbitration Clause in Insurance Policy Applies Only to Disputes Involving the Insurer, and Not Between Insureds

    Tennessee Court Follows "Vast Majority of State and Federal Courts" by Upholding Waiver of Class-Wide Proceedings

    Federal Court Says National Arbitration Forum's Arbitral Procedures Ensure the Selection of a Neutral Arbitrator

    Arbitrators With Specific Authority Can Issue Supplemental Awards, Says NJ Court

    Tenth Circuit: Federal Courts Have Authority to Order Arbitration Outside Their District

    Party Does Not Waive Right to Arbitrate by Filing Lawsuit Unless There is Prejudice to the Opposing Party

    In California, Parties Can Contract for Judicial Review of Arbitrator's Misapplication of the Law By Using "Magic Words"

    Parties' Submissions Expand Arbitrator's Authority

    Alabama Supreme Court Says Arbitration Rules Must Provide For Award of Punitive Damages

    Arbitration Provides Consumers a Full Range of Legal Remedies



    Expectations are too high/too low

    Conflict Can Be Constructive

    While it is true that most of us are not particularly comfortable with conflict, it can be a positive and productive way to achieve desirable outcomes:

  • Clarify important problems and issues
  • Achieve solutions to problems together
  • Resolve mutually important issues
  • Find your authentic voice and tell your personal truth
  • Ease emotions and stress when you experience one of the common causes of conflicts
  • Build cooperation between you and another person when you reveal more about yourself and make it your priority to really hear the other person
  • Increase your awareness about yourself and another person
  • Develop deeper understanding, empathy and communication skills

    Don’t be afraid of that may arise in your relationships. Learn the all-important skills to resolve respectively and constructively. Create the love relationship, family relationships and business relationships that match your emotional intelligence and maturity.

    Remember, only YOU can make it happen!

    Copyright Dr. Jackie Black 1999-2005
    Dr. Jackie is an internationally recognized relationship expert, educator and coach. Advice and coaching about personal relationships is Dr. Jackie's passion. Her goal is to inspire and support single men, single women and couples through the challenges and pitfalls of dating, loving and building lasting, committed relationships in today's fast-paced world. Dr. Jackie's Relationship Coaching Programs and Groups, her Blog, downloadable PodCasts and her Internet streaming radio show are jam-packed with valuable dating tips and strategies.

    Check out Dr. Jackie's Podcasts here: http://www.relationshiptalkpodcast.com

    Check out Dr. Jackie's Blog here: http://www.askdrjackie.com

    1.866.419.5928

    Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dr._Jackie_Black

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